SUICIDE: the act or an instance of taking one’s own life voluntarily and intentionally.
Sure I decide. Suicide. This topic has such a stigma attached to it I sincerely hope you keep reading so you can see and learn what this topic truly means to me. I would say that I personally faced suicide and lost people, loved ones to suicide over ten times in my 37 year old life. Just so we get those numbers straight. In my late teens and early twenties my view on suicide was very different. I felt betrayed and angry and had thoughts like “that selfish son of a bitch” how could he/she do this? What a terrible thing for the family and friends. Very much me as the victim approach. But thank god we all grow up. Let’s just say I’ve had a life with rough edges. When I was younger I suffered from depression and I have seen and experienced pure darkness. This life, this world, it just isn’t for everyone. I have come to learn that some people are indeed better off living in the beyond, emerging into the realm. For me suicide should be seen as “so I decide” and we must let them decide. We must stick with the love we have for our loved ones who decide to take their own lives. With love and respect comes understanding and compassion. Compassion literally means to feel with. We should feel with them and deep inside of us find the space which truly connects us. To feel with also means to find a deep understanding of how life would be like in their shoes. To feel with is the most essential tool we have in this life at this time.
We should just love, deeply, utterly, selflessly. We should just be good and treat others good. Love heals this world. Love heals deep wounds. Love is all we have. So when you read this, think of someone you love dearly and then promise me you will tell them you love them. Promise yourself. Feeling unwanted, unworthy, low, small, down and highly insecure are just some of the many ingredients to wanting to end this life. I don’t know if we can really prevent it, I don’t know if we can really fight it, there are many help groups out there who try their upper best to get suicide numbers down. I do believe that we can change things around, with love and compassion. You can’t change people’s minds though. The biggest shift for me in understanding suicide was just that. To completely look at the situation selflessly. To not make something about yourself but about the other. If they really wanted this, even if it’s something you would never do or decide, you just have to make peace with what it is they wanted. You just have to feel with them and not against them. Always remember who are we to judge? Trust me, I know. You start to feel with them and what they went through. You start to see life through their eyes and you start to appreciate every split second you have had with this person. And you wish them well. And you wish them safe journeys beyond. And you know your love served them well for the time they had. Your love will forever live on with them. I personally can find a lot of peace in that. Knowing I did the very best I could, knowing they did too. Think of the three A’s. Acknowledge. Acceptance. Appreciation. Make your life a life in which they can live on with you. Create an altar for them in your home, make sure they are remembered, sing songs for them and dream sweet dreams for them. Feel their spirit and keep bringing that into this world. I try doing this all day everyday and hope you will too.